Shattered heart
by Nikki-Vixen
Summary: After yet another argument, James and Meowth have enough of Jesse's temper and take off. But what will reunite the team? Will James ever crack Jesse's stone heart and will Jesse ever put her shattered heart back together?
1. The fight

AN; I don't own Pokemon, or any of it's characters- but I wish I did :P And just in case you big time nintentdo people read this - I'm not making any money from this! PLEASE DON'T SUE! I'm too pennyless to pay! -This continues throughout the whole story...

Further AN; Hey everybody! I'm still here! I haven't had any inspiration for my unfinished "There for you" fic yet, but this popped into my mind and I wanted to get it out. Hopefully I can finish this all in one go and then edit it later. I will chapter it up and I warn you, it may get confusing. Let me know what you think with a review! Thanks! XD

**Shattered heart of stone**

In the past...

"You are the saddest exscuse for a man that I have ever seen!" The fiery red-head spat, threateningly pushing her blue haired parter's chest in rage. Her sapphire eyes, cold and full of spite bored into his sad and hurt emerald eyes. Her acid tounge emitted it's toxic words and poisioned the man who stood cowaring in front of her. At the beginning of the argument, the man had stood his ground and argued with the creul woman who stood in front of him, belittleing and humiliating him in front of their other parter, a small scratch-cat Pokemon. Her tightened fists began to shake with more and more anger as the fight continued. "Tell me James, was you born this way? Or are you just an idiot for our benefit! Your a lousy partner, a lousy criminal and you know what?...your a lousy friend too!" she screamed at him as her reddened face stood inches away from his. She thumped him in the face, hard. His eyes whelmed instantly after hearing her last words and feeling her balled fist connect with his cheek bone. He took a defensive step away from her. Her venomnous attack seeping further into his viens until he struggled for breath.

"Jesse...you...how?...I don't know what to say" he struggled to find words to match his feelings. His eyes stared pitifully onto the floor as he raised his gloved hand over his chest, as if she had shot him in the heart and the other hand felt the red mark which her hand had left on his cheek. Jesse's angry features turned into a look of disgust.

"What? Now your going to cry? Why don't you try being a man James!" she snarled remorselessly. He snapped his head up to look at her. The sad expression vanished and replaced with a look of pure hatred. He took his hand away from his heart, still holding his red face and pointed it at her furiously.

"One day Jess! One day, your going to be all alone in this World. Noone will give a damn about you! And I won't be there to pick up the pieces when you fall- I've had enough of your bullying!" His voice raised and stern enough to let her know she had crossed a line, yet never shouting at her. She placed her hands on her hip and she laughed at him as he pushed past her.

"Oh, so now your going to sulk in your room and cry it all out? Grow up James" He didn't stop to retaliate. Only stormed into his bedroom and slammed the door. The Pokemon who had watched the whole ordeal began to creep away...not wanting to be the next victim to Jesse's hormonal attack. "And YOU Meowth!" She shouted as she spun on her heel to face him. He cringed. She tried to yell, but her voice got stuck...suddenly she was overwhelmed with consern. Realising what she had just said and done. She choked it down, telling herself 'it was his fault'. Meowth had paused in midstep and turned to look at her. Wondering why she had delayed her attack. She shook her head furiously and raised a hand to him. "Just get out of my sight! I don't even want to know your breathing! -it's bad enough I have to look at you!".

With her last words she walked into the kitchin, her head began to pound and she rubbed her temples, trying to soothe her pain. The washing up, which James had neatly piled together on the side for some reason angered her even more. She swung forward and with an alimighty scream of frustration she threw the plates, the cutlry, mugs and glasses onto the wooden floor. The sound of the smashing plates and mugs only hurt her head more, but somewhat relieaved her frustration. She took a deep breath, steadying herself against the side. Her mind was racing with conflicting emotions and she desperatly fought them away. After a few minutes of calm breating, she opened one of the wooden cubboards, her hands searching for the paracetamol container. After eventually finding the right bottle, she groaned when discovering that all the tablets had been used. Throwing the bottle over her shoulder, she looked for her sleeping tablets instead. Decideing that the best thing to do with a lousy day, was to end it. She took two white pills and kicked the bin over on her way out of the kitchin.

Meowth was sprawled across the uncomfortable sofa and flicking through channels on the trio's equally as crappy TV. When Jesse passed through the living room, every muscle in his body tensed. Maybe it was a Pokemon thing...maybe a cat thing? But when danger was about, Meowth's body tended to do it's own thing. After witnessing the beating James took tonight, he was determined not to anger Jesse further. It didn't take Jesse long to reach her bedroom and she groggily muscled her last bit of draining strength to slam her door for effect. Meowth let out a breath he didn't even realise he was holding. He was sick of Jesse's tantrums and mood swings and he could tell that even plasid James, her life long best friend, was growing sick of her. And Meowth could'nt blame him either. He somtimes wondered why James hung around and let her treat him like that. Though Meowth could probally guess that James had long been in love with his violent tempered partner, he could also sense that Jesse was slowly but surely breaking him down and suffocating the flame he held for her. There was alot of things about his two friends past's that he didn't know, but somthing had bonded the two together ...fate maybe? Maybe somthing dramatic the odd pair had experienced together... maybe even love. Though Jesse rarely ever showed it. In fact, somtimes Meowth considered Jesse was incapable of such an emotion. But somewhere, deep, deep down maybe there was a Jesse who held a flame for James too. Jess was a hard girl to understand and an even harder girl to grow to like, but this only feuled Meowth's theory that somthing must have happened to her in her past to make her this way. Surely no human, no...no **being **could ever be so heartless? On the odd day, she would show she was actually warm blooded, but those days were rare and getting rarer.

Meowth sighed again and glanced at the two mahogany doors that stood next to each other. One belonging to Jesse, the other to James. An unnnerving vibe of anger still hung in the atmosphere and Meowth could'nt shake off the feeling that a change was about to take place...a big change. A dramatic change...and he could'nt tell weither he liked the feeling or not...

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Argh, end of chapter one. This is kind of a introduction, but I will return to the past in later chapters. Hang in their folks! And review! The more the merrier!

Nikki-Vixen


	2. Never let them see you broken

**Two Years later...**

Jesse sipped her cup of coffee and read the paper that she hadn't had time to read eairlier that morning. It had been two years to the exact day, when James and Meowth had walked out of her life, two years since things had changed for the better and two years since she had experienced any human emotion other than resentment and hate. Yup, life was good for Jesse. After hearing of James and Meowth quitting Team Rocket and heading off to the land of Johto, she had flown up the ranks in her job. It seemed the rage which had been brought on by being abbandoned by her only friends and only man she had ever considered stronger emotions for, was enough to turn her into a fully motivated and respected Rocket member. She no longer wore her customised, white skirt and mini jumper, that the rocket grunts shamefully sported, instead, she wore her dark purple bottoms and her mini jumper purple top. Only a small red "R" sat in the right corner. A "R" she wore with proud. It gained her respect and authority...but was somehow more to her now, then it had ever been before. Not just because of the power that it held for her. But because it had become her life. Her only reason for exsistence. The only thing in her life which was stable and consistant. Everything else had crumbled from beneath her feet. James hadn't even said "goodbye".

She shook her head disregarding her thoughts and scolding herself for thinking about the tretchous man she had banished from her memorys. In fact, it was the first time in a very very long time she had even thought about him. Somtimes at night she lay under the stars and her mind would wander while she was in the place between asleep and awake. Sometimes she would hear him laugh or see him smile, but waking without him around only grinded her heart into a further nothing. She constantly reminded herself that she was the only person she could trust. Never speaking more than a sentence to anyone other than the boss, even her bickering with Cassidy had stopped. And after the insident in the cafeteria, Cassidy had well kept her distance from Jesse anyway. This thought, brought a smile to Jesse's face. The look of terror in Cassidy's eyes as she had pinned her against the wall and throttled her, until the Boss had walked into the room and demanded her to stop. That, had been a great victory in Jess' eyes. It was like, every reason and moral had flown from her body the day she woke up to an empty apartment. And with the rage and newly found devotion to her job came great strength and power. Grunts worshipped her, the brown, yellow and red sections feared her and the special rocket's, such as Domino had a great amount of respect for her. It seemed, her team...her "friends", had been what had been keeping her back all the years and now she felt free. She even plotted in secret some boring days, to over throw Giovanni and take Team rocket for herself.

She got up from her chair while screwing up the paper and threw it in the bin. Her coffee cup, now empty, was placed in the full sink. Jesse had never been a handy girl. She could'nt even cook anything without it becoming a safety hazard or burning to a crisp, so take out had become her main source of food. In fact, she hadn't had a home cooked meal in two years. It was James' strong point, not hers. She shook head again and silently trailed across the kitchin and into the living room. She ran her hand across the beige leather sofa which had replaced the old crusty one and looked around the apartment, feeling a sense of pride in how good the place looked after she had done it up. And all on her own... she felt a ping of sorrow touch her dead heart. All on her own...just like she always was these days. No laughter and jokes. Nooone to mess around with or remenise about the good old days. Noone to do the dishes or make the dinner. She had to plot her own plans, on her own...watch TV on her own...everything. There wasn't anybody else to blame when somthing went wrong, maybe this was why she had become so sucessful. She had prove, maybe only to herself or maybe to someone else, that it hadn't been her fault. It wasn't her fault they had left her.

She looked at the clock on the wall and noted it was 8:00pm. Her next mission briefing was in Giovanni's office at 9, but she suddenly felt the need to escape the apartment. She grabbed her keys from the coffee table and left her home. Walking down the long white corridors and wondering if she could call her apartment a home...a home was where a family lived. And the only family she had ever felt she had, was long gone. Only her pride wouldn't let her change her resisdence. Atleast, that is what she had always thought. Now she considered that maybe she had never left it, because it was the last place she ever felt at home. Home, with a family...a strange family, but a family none the less. Maybe if she stayed there, they would come back...

This time she slapped herself on the forehead in anger. It seemed that her slight, sidetracked, thought about James eailier had stirred up a whole bunch of unanwsered questions, raw angry thoughts and worst of all...sorrow and hurt. She swallowed a lump that was forming in the back of her mouth, nearly choking as she did so. She willed her thoughts and feelings away, shutting them out and banishing them for eturnity. Truth was, she had been doing the same thing her whole life. Whenever somthing scared her, or somthing needed answers that she could not provide she would simply shut it out and push it away...she didn't intend to change any time soon either...

A black uniformed grunt walked down the corridor in front of her.

"Miss Jesse" he stated as he bowed his head as a sign of respect. She waved an annoyed hand at him to carry on and he did so. Somtimes having so much authority was annoying. Noone noticed her exsistence before hand. Grunts who walked past each other in the corridor would simply push past her and her team. They were the underdogs, the losers. She crinkled her nose at this thought. How could she have been such a pushover back then? The thought of being such a wimp digusted her.

When she finally reached the end of the corridor, Jesse walked through the lobby and pushed her security code into the main doors alarm system. After pressing her five digits and listening to the annoying "dink" sound made as the computer accepted her code, the pressured metal doors slowly opened. She walked outside and the cold air hit her face. She walked into the woodland until she reached a wooden bench, where she placed her cold rear end.

Hoothoots and Murkrows flapped in the trees and the odd Pokemon would rustle the bushes. Jesse looked up at the icey moon and dazzeling white stars. The cold breeze kissing her cheeks and slowly passing by unnoticed by the woman who's sapphire eyes stared coldly into space.

"I'll never forgive you, James" she whispered with less anger than she would have liked. "Never"

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Oooo Jess is mad. And what happened to James and Meowth? What will bring the pair back together? Review people, cos next chapter is about James and Meowth and their lives! And reviews make me work faster! Sorry it's abit slow to begin with...when I actually finish this, I may edit it. But till now...just review!

Nikki-Vixen


	3. Insanity breaks hearts

**Shattered heart chapter 3**

A loud buzzing sound broke the early morning silence, only to be followed by a heavy and annoyed grunt. James raised his messey bedhead and let his vision clear before slapping his annoyed hand down on the alarm clock that sat on his wooden bedside table.

He yawned as his mind slowly adjusted into reality. He rolled onto his back and blinked up at the ceiling. He hadn't been looking forward to this day. If he'd of had his own way, he would have just slept through it, but alas, he had responsibiltys to uphold. Duties that needed doing. He cringed and winced his eyes shut tight.

"Oooh, I don't want to get up" he whined softily. This kind of whining would have won him an early morning smack back in the old days, somthing which he surprisidly had missed. It wasn't so easy to pry yourself from a warm and cosy bed, when you didn't have the fear of a good smack round the head to get you up. He reopened his eyes and pushed himself onto his elbows, glancing out of the window and wondering what kind of day it was...he groaned again when his eyes met the rain that was pouring from the grey sky outside his window.

"Hey, are you gettin up taday or not?" A familular voice called from behind James' bedroom door. James sighed loudly.

"Yes...But I'm not happy about it" he grumbled miserably as he pushed himself over the side of his bed and stood to his feet. He staggered across his room and into his bathroom. Taking care of his morning rountine quickly, he emerged only a few minutes later wearing his fashionable jeans and black t-shirt. As he ran a comb through his hair and walked back into his bedroom, he saw her sitting on the end of his bed. He paused and just stared for a moment as she sat pulling on her leather boots. "...Jess" he whispered. She looked up at him, slightly annoyed he had interupted her morning routine.

"C'mon James your going to be late!" she scolded, but her slight frown changed into a smile. He smiled back and continued combing his hair.

"Do I look ok?" he asked as he walked past her to view himself in his mirror. When he recieved no anwser he turned around, but she was gone. He took a deep breath and realised he had been doing it again...talking to himself as if he had been talking to her. Seeing her and thinking about her. He shook his head and silently scorned himself for thinkning about her. "...Of all days..." he mumbled, setting the comb on his bedside table he mentally prepared himself to face the World again.

Meowth had been listening through the door to the conversation his friend had been having with himself again. With a heavy heart he sighed. James was a great guy, deep down, he was decent and anyone who spoke to him would never in a million years guess he had ever been associated with such an organisation as Team Rocket...but it seemed his friend's mentality had been going down hill the past year or two. He had begun talking to himself, seeing things and having nightmares. Meowth was the only one who knew who James believed himself to be talking to. Noone else knew anything about her. James refused to talk about her, even when Meowth had been the one to start the topic, he would quickly change it or simply ignore it.

James appeared into the living area, he didn't speak of his encouter, but instead hummed a tune. Meowth listened to the familular tune of the team rocket motto being hummed through James' lips. He wondered if James realised what he was humming, but did not air his questions.

"Hey, I made cereal fer you. It's on the counter" the cat pokemon said as he flicked through the channels on the small TV screen, every now and then he would take a pawful of popcron from a big blue bowl that sat on the couch arm.

"Ok thanks" James said briefly as he walked into the kitchin. Meowth stood up and followed him.

"James, you gotta talk about it somtime you know" he said softily as he sat on one of two seats that accompanied a small table. James ignored him and kept eating his cereal. Meowth frowned. "James, I'm talking to youse." he said irritated. James continued to ignore him and instead kept his focus on filling his face. Meowth felt himself becoming more and more angry with his blue haired companion. It didn't take long for him to finish bowl of cereal and Meowth knew he was trying to avoid him.

"Thanks for the cereal Meowth. But I'm going to be late" he said as he rose from his seat avoiding all eye contact and took the bowl to the sink. He then proceeded to exit the room as quickly as he could. Grabbing his blue jacket from the back of the couch and picking up the keys that sat on the coffee table he headed to the door. "See you later Meowth" he called.

Meowth darted across the room and blocked his exit.

"Jimmy, I know this is hard fer youse to deal with, but you can't keep pretending it never happened!" he said sternly. James' eyes began to fill with emotion and Meowth knew that deep inside, it was killing him. One of the only times James had ever talked about thier experience with leaving Jesse, was a few days after they had escaped. He had been quilt stricken and a real emotional mess. Meowth had asked him if he wished to return home, but he had refused. And looking into his deep emerald eyes, Meowth thought he could almost still see the quilt and the pain surfacing in his eyes.

"Meowth, I'm going to be late." he said simply as he slipped his jacket on. His voice sounded firm, but not angry. Almost, remorseful... "And I don't care about what today is. I don't care about her. I don't care about anything except getting to work on time right now, so just let me past" the breaking and crackle in his voice told Meowth he was lying, but the scratch cat stepped away and let him leave.

James pushed his hands into his pockets and stepped into the cold rain. Sobs caught the back of his throat and he tried forcefully to push them back down. Looking up at the sky for a second before he started his journey to work, he caught himself wondering how his ex partner was. She had meant so much to him...she had been his everything, yet she had treated him so bad. He hated the way she had belittled and mocked him, though he realised it was only through her own insecurities that she was the way she was. He understood so many things about her that noone else had, and stuck with her through all her violence. He had been her scapegoat and her emotional punch bag, yet he still couldn't shake the old feelings of wishing just for one time, that she would have just cried on his shoulder. To let him hold her and to drop the guard and just cry.

He kicked a stone as he walked through the park. A cold breeze made him shiver. The park was pretty much empty, but then again it was early morning. The occasional person walking their Poochyena or Zigazigoon was all that passed him.

"It's such a bitter day..." he sighed as he found himself whining to himself again.

"Oh stop complaining and just bare it" her voice surrounded him again. He stopped and turned around. She sped up her walking pace to catch up with him then they walked side by side. She put up her red hood and gave him a smirk. He returned her smirk and slowed his pace so not to make her out of breath. The smell of her perfume fumigated him and even the warmth of her closeness felt all too real. He blinked sadly and looked at her. Everytime he thought she was there she would dissapear. He didn't want her to go...

"Jesse" he spoke quietly.

"What?" even her abruptness was all too real.

"Why do you keep going away?" he asked as he felt warm tears begin to form in the corner of his eyes. She gave a small laugh and looked up to the sky.

"I wasn't the one who went away" she said softily. He snapped his gaze from the ground up to look at her, but again she was gone. The tears taht now blinded his vision slid slowly down his face, mixing with the rain. He wiped his eyes and carried on walking. Her last words echoed in his brain. He couldn't help but feel a sinking feeling in his heart that he had abbandoned his best friend. He had always promised he would never leave her. That he would stick by her through thick and thin...yet now he was not so sure...had he broken that promise? What if he had broken her heart? What if somthing bad had happened to her?

He stopped in his tracks. The exit to the park in his view, his mind refused to let his body do anything else but stand still in the cold rain...he looked up and closed his eyes. Letting the rain wash away his tears. Only three words could escape his lips...

"Jesse...I'm sorry"

Wow, I don't like this chapter atall...I may rewrite it. But hey, I updated so yay for me. Hopefully next chappie coming soon... Please review

Nikki-Vixen


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